Game of Thrones S05 rant (SPOILERS)

I couldn’t keep my fingers from typing after what I saw in this season (5) of Game of Thrones.

I don’t even know where to begin. I’ll be venting here, so yes, this will be a list of things I did not like. Sure there are things I did like, but right now I’m just too annoyed and need to vent.

Perhaps I can start in what I and many others think was the worst part of the season: Dorne.

Dorne

Most of what happened in Dorne, as book readers know, never happened in the books.

As I mentioned in a previous post, I believe Jaime was sent to Dorne to bid time for his reunion with Brienne (who had, I thought, plenty to do other than stare at a window).The surprise here is that Jaime basically had as much screentime as Myranda. Dorne was about Bronn, and tits.

But this is something I’ll discuss with more detail later on.

No Arianne Martell? Why not? Isn’t this Dorne? Isn’t this the ONLY place where women are allowed to rule since the times of Nymeria? Why the hell are you going to give her plot to a pubescent kid and a vindictive widow?

Which brings me to another point: Ellaria Sand. It is amazing how a character that seemed to show so much promise can be reduced to a pile of crap due to poor writing. They made Ellaria ignore all of Oberyn´s wishes, and his way of thinking.She killed a little girl, an innocent little girl, who loved and was loved by the Heir to Dorne, damn… such poor writing. I guess she doesn’t care about what Jaime will do to Trystane.

The only good part, to me, was the heartbreak Jaime must have felt after losing his daughter, especially when he had finally found someone that still loved him (not that I wished that on him, I just think it was George Martinesque).

Back to Jaime, or better, the no-Jaime. Bronn’s scenes were useless, and they contributed nothing to the progression of the story. The infamous ‘tit scene’looked like it was filmed by a horny 13 year old boy. Fine, great tits, but did I really have to get flashed 15 times with them?

They could have used this time explaining things better to viewers or including ommited characters, or showing more of other characters (like Jaime).

I don’t even want to talk about the Sand Snakes, but I will. I feel sorry for the actresses. What was once to me a beautiful variety of women, both physically and mentally, became something very poor, oversimplified and basic. The fight scenes? Ugh. The costumes? Copy paste. The personality? Flavourless. The acting? Poor. The script? Hair pulling bad.
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Doran Martell and Areo Hotah: Underused. You had one good thing, and you didn’t use it. Both actors could have done so much more had they been given the right material to work with.

Winterfell

Let me just say that when I found out that the Brienne-meets Sansa scene was meant to convey Sansa telling Brienne to get the f out of dodge, I sighed a sigh of frustration and remembered the Jaime/ Cersei rape scene. Another poorly filmed scene. What makes it worse is that it just perpetualized the idea viewers get that Sansa is just a stupid little girl.

Next: Brienne spends three weeks staring at a window. Awesome stuff, you really used one of my favourite characters well. Well done!

Next: Sansa gets raped. Expected since she took Jeyne’s place, but even though it hurt to watch, as they intended, I had hopes that it would heat her up to the point that she’s actually do something other than picking a lock and getting angry at Theon. Stab somebody ffs!

Myranda was probably the best part for me, both her nastiness, and her death (but it really should have been Sansa doing it). I guess Theon had to do it as the symbolic moment where he shows he still has some balls on him.

Stannis: his death was weak to say the least. Although the actor did a good job with his face as he sat there by the tree (you could see his inner turmoil as he thought about his last words), “go on, do your duty” felt like, I don’t know, he owed us more than that after what he did.
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Oh!! and I almost forgot: the most seasoned and best tactician in the whole story marches upon Winterfell, against the people of the North, with no horses, no siege weapons, out in the open, with half his men (and even those were weak, and had 0 motivation).
“Uhhh My Lord, half of your troops left ya.” , “Uhhhh my Lord, looks like there will be no siege afterall…”, what the hell? Way to go D&D, I understand that Stannis is indeed going to pull a lot of the crap he pulled this season, but you didn’t have to make him all of a sudden lose all of his skills.

By the way, Melissandre needs to get a new pair of glasses, she ain’t reading the flames so well.

The Wall

Nothing much to say about the wall other than Jon’s death. Still no warging hints? Really? Why the hell couldn’t they just add a 10 second wolf dream in one of the earlier episodes and then have Jon utter “Ghost” before he died?.

This is a vent post but I loved the Hardhome scene sooo much I just have to mention it here. Loved – it.

Essos

Hi, could you please let me into Jorah’s head so that I can figure out why the hell is he contaminating the whole frigging continent? Because I can’t tell with his lack of facial expressions. I can’t understand why he’d do it, does anyone reading this have any idea?

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Also, and off-rant topic: is anybody else considering the chance of Varys being the Harpy?

There, I think that’s mostly it. I have a feeling I am forgetting something, but I’ll add it later on if I rememeber anything else.

I know I’ve been absent for months, hope everyone has been well 🙂 I’ll probably write a life update soon, if I behave 😉

Sand Snake image from : https://scontent-cdg2-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xat1/v/t1.0-9/11330045_428932317277937_661960546874139124_n.png?oh=51a2d34043529d5e4678fdc44e5f7be4&oe=55C8B0A2
Robert meme from: https://scontent-atl1-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xta1/v/t1.0-9/11401521_700562223388759_2519816224788143779_n.jpg?oh=3942a5b23e46af223ee779df4ae0b0d9&oe=5600F690
Jorah meme from: https://fbcdn-sphotos-e-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xpa1/v/t1.0-9/11259859_389862917863959_2329793478248300812_n.jpg?oh=89bb45183c5eb251211668f05c8c0e08&oe=560D4F88&__gda__=1438674480_c62e04ebe1b0dd4ed91ce648155b16ff